Happy New Year!

Hey dudes! It’s me! I exist! Things around here are the same as usual, someone is pooping or puking or sneezing up stuff. I’m outnumbered by my children and chores everyday, but we are happy and mostly healthy. It’s pretty good.
Now on to my experiment. I’ve decided to Benjamin Button myself. I refuse to get older and fatter and stupider so I’m going to get hotter and skinnier and smartier.
Now for the younger and hotter part, I’m going to just keep buying creams and shit and eventually I’ll probably break down into Botox but the time hasn’t come for that yet. I’m going with the theory that any wrinkles I have are due to dehydration so I must drink more water. I enjoy living in denial.
Skinnier part is where the experimentin’ comes in. I have been cross fitting the shit out of myself and I am getting pretty buff dudes. I’m super excited about it but still have quite the jelly roll around my middle section. This is not new for me. I’ve always carried extra fat around my waist because of my heritage and genetics (or maybe purple laffy taffy and ciabatta bread). So I’m going to experiment with my diet and see what combination of things might help my guts release the Kung fu death grip they have on fat cells. Don’t get all worked up guys – I’m not going to starve myself. In fact I’m going to eat a lot. Like a-hole lot. Just different stuff. January’s experiment is cutting out extra sugar (like whipped cream in my latte), wheat, and alcohol. I know it sounds extreme to give all of these delicious things up at once but as someone who has been drunk for like 2 months straight, I can tell you that I am more than ready to take a break from alcohol. Also as someone who has eaten treats since Halloween, I am ready to give them up as well. Wheat might be a different challenge for me, but I feel like it’s going to be super beneficial for my “lose the spare tire” goal.
Now the smartier part is a little trickier. I have been toying with the idea of getting my MBA and have visited a couple of programs to check them out. If money was no object, I would sign up today. Unfortunately, I haven’t won the lottery yet (note to self: but lottery tickets.) So, I’m still tossing this idea around but trying to figure out a way I can do it.
I hope one day that I can set a goal to not constantly have crazy goals. Right now though, it turns out I am a gal who needs things to keep changing. I think I drive everyone around me crazy.


2 thoughts on “Happy New Year!

  1. Now how are we supposed to tandem drink while figuring out my mess of QuickBooks if you’re on the wagon dammit?! 🙂

    I’ve thought about my MBA, but it feels so useless where I live. *sigh* I so wish I lived in a bigger city like you.

    Good goals lady!

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