Today’s NaBloPoMo post is supposed to be about the last compliment you received.
It’s really hard for me to think of just one because people are just always complimenting me. Um, yeah, that is a joke. So instead, I thought I would talk about a recent compliment that just really meant a lot to me. It was from my husband. We were talking about how a lot of people are afraid of him. He’s like the big boss man at his company. Like the one people get nervous about coming around. Plus he’s just intimidating anyway, so I’m sure they are all like, “Aww, fuck, the Boss Man is here” when he walks through the door. In fact, they actually call him Boss Man. I think that’s just mostly a way of sucking up, but don’t even get me started on that.
Anyway, I was saying how when I first met him that I was not in any way intimidated by him. Of course, he wasn’t my boss or anything. Just a cute dude that I kinda wanted to make out with. I told my BFF after the first few days of knowing him that I would, in fact, date that guy. Within a few dates another one of my friends told me that she could tell I was going to marry him. But there was never a part of me that thought, wow, this guy is intimidating, or this guy scares me or anything like that.
When this came up, my husband said, “I’m not surprised, there’s not a lot that intimidates you.” Or something to that effect. After over a decade with this man, it really truly shocked me to hear him say that. Because dudes, I feel scared about something. All. The. Time. I prodded him a little bit to get him to explain further (and thereby extending the compliment.) He basically told me that in social settings, I’m not afraid to talk to people and try to make friends. He also talked about some of the adventures I’ve delved into not knowing if I’d succeed or fail. For example, one year I decided I wanted to do a triathlon. Never swam, never owned a road bike. I signed up, practiced in a lake, went to spinning class and rented a bike the day before the race. And I finished. I have also participate in a winter adventure race (first time on snowshoes,) a half marathon, several 5 and 10K’s and even decided one year to take speed skating lessons. I wasn’t good, but man, was it fun.
I’ve thought a lot about this compliment because, you see, I used to have this need for people to like me. Since coming into my 30’s, I’ve worked really hard at overcoming this particular trait. Although I am social and outgoing, I am actually quite shy when I first meet someone (shocking I know.) This has lead to more than enough people deducing that I am a bitch. I’m not a bitch, never have been. And over the last few years, I’ve sortof learned to be ok with people thinking that. If I have the desire to get to know this person, they will see that is not true. If they don’t, it doesn’t matter. The point is that this all goes back to being confident, and not intimidated. Even by my own self.
Now of course this post sounds bragadocious, but how else can you talk about a compliment you’ve received without giving yourself a little pat on the back right?